Wild Willing

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My Healing Experience with Equine Gestalt

X-ray vision. That was what came to my mind, hungry for a logical reason as to how this magic was happening.

It was a superpower many humans might wish for. The irony being, I doubted that if ever they were granted it, they would use it for good the way that this horse was. 

How was this horse seeing me so clearly? X-ray vision was an amusing explanation for my imagination. X-ray machines can detect bone fractures, some types of injuries to the soft tissue, tumors, even lung or heart problems. However, emotions and their movements, or lack thereof, within the body, remain unseen by even the most sophisticated machines.

The emotional, unseen realm is where horses have technology beat, without question. Horses possess a wisdom akin to what is hard-won by our species most devoted sages and seers. If a part of me had ever doubted this truth, even after a lifetime of being in relationship with horses, this experience would make me a full-fledged believer.

After interviewing Kelly Dukarski of A Wild Omen, an Equine Gestalt Coach who sang the praises of the transformative approach, I booked an appointment with my local Equine Gestaltist. Fortunately for me, the fabulous Kate Quilici Hernandez of Ranch House Collective operates her practice within an hour drive from the coastal Northern California region I call home.

On June 6th, I drove down to see for myself why Kelly, Kate, and others I was only just finding out about in the horse world, believed so strongly in this work called Equine Gestalt.

Upon arriving, Kate introduced me to a stunning palomino, Rocco, who had a very unique double swirl pattern on his forehead twisting in opposing directions between two sweet and serene doe eyes. He was to be my Equine Guide for the session. 

With no preconceived notions as to what to expect as the three of us entered into a round pen encircled on one end by wild forest, I maintained only to keep an open mind and heart. Kate set Rocco loose and ushered us to sit in chairs near the center. Immediately, I was surprised as I half expected Rocco to do what my horses do when I set them loose in a new space - nonchalantly cruise around and graze. Instead, he strode over to my side and stood patiently, with eyes at half mast, as we began.

Kate explained to me the safety procedures, and that if ever Rocco’s presence was overwhelming for me, I could simply ask him to move or move myself. I smiled as she spoke about boundaries and how she runs a tight ship with her horses. I could relate. But here, she encouraged me to let go and see what comes up. Knowing that not even she could say what would happen, or especially what should happen brought a feeling of ease. Just be present. A cherished lesson from horses.

I felt my breathing steadily deepen and expand, noticing that Rocco had inched closed to my chair. Again he wasn’t doing any of the things I might have expected from a horse who seemed to want my attention - no nudging or investigating me with his nose - but rather, as Kate explained, he was aligning himself with me. Not quite side by side, facing forward, but with his head and neck angled in front of me so that his left shoulder could really line up with my shoulder. Kate noticed, this was heart chakra alignment. Oof. Another deep breath.

As Kate and I talked about my intentions and what brought me to this session, a part of me melted. With the feeling of safety enclosing me, my heart unguarded, I spoke to something I had not expected to draw attention to. I laughed, hearing Kelly’s words from the interview in my head:

… Oftentimes, like I said, our brain is working really hard to protect us. So we've already thought about our strategies on how we're going to show up. And the stuff that we're going to talk about long before we even get there…. 

But when they get there and they have an opportunity to get present in nature, right out in nature and have these awarenesses where they slow down and I ask them to tap into their body, to start to feel into their body and get out of their head, the session really unfolds from there.

Rocco stepped closer as I spoke. Heart melting energy overcame me, gently nudging me to keep going. I knew what I had to talk about. There were a thousand other things going on, things that had demanded my attention like flies swirling around my eyes in thick summer heat. But it turned out, there was an unaddressed wound at the root of it all - at my literal root - that sapped my energy to tackle everything else. 

The wound would only keep turning, rotting and drawing more flies if I could not address it. What was that saying, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar? A nice sentiment, indeed. But as horse people, I think we can cut the you know what, and agree that flies are head over heels for one thing only. So if you don’t want flies, you need to manage your manure. 

It was time to clear out the toxins and waste. As Kate pointed out, you can’t draw the things you want in if you can’t let go of the things that aren’t yours to hold. So, here we go.

As we spoke to what caused the unaddressed wound that I carried at my root, Kate helped me to see that it was a hurt perpetrated by someone in my life. That it wasn’t mine to hold, but theirs. 

The setting shifted as she had me rise up so she could rearrange the chairs. She walked to the fence and carried back a mounting block which she sat upon. In the empty chair, she had me picture the person who caused this hurt in my root chakra. Imagining their higher being joining us for the next part, she had me speak to them as if they were sitting looking back at me. 

What happened next might have been transformative still if we were sitting talking in an office setting. But watching Rocco move to the chair as if instructed by our focus and act on it in ways that directly translated to what I was releasing, and where it had been trapped in my body… that was simply beyond belief.

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